Yet another pointless remake, part 981

[yendi]

Roland Emmerich, a talentless hack whose best screen moment involved taking the "There can be only one" quote from Highlander and having Jaye Davidson append "Ra" to the end of it*, has been given the job of unnecessarily remaking Fantastic Voyage.

Bold prediction: It will suck donkey balls.

Bolder prediction: Pictures of executives sucking donkey balls is how Emmerich gets his jobs in the first place.

*Which is not to imply this is a good moment. Just the best that Emmerich is capable of.

Comments

[feste-sylvain.livejournal.com]

Uwe Boll, who has at least as little talen as Emmerich, continues to get directing jobs because he has proven over and over that he can bring a pitched picture in on or under budget.

Donkey balls need not be involved; short-sighted producer behavior does.

[hughcasey.livejournal.com]

From a quality standpoint, his career really went downhill after "STARGATE", didn't it?

I have to admit, though... I just *LOVE* "STARGATE". It's a damned great little movie... a fun pulp-adventure film wrapped up in military sci-fi paper. However, it looks more and more like that was despite, not because of, Mssrs. Emmerich and Devlin.

[zarq.livejournal.com]

We saw The Bourne Ultimatum last weekend and caught a trailer for 10,000 BC (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/10,000_BC_(film)), Emmerich's latest work, due to open around Christmas. If the trailer (http://www.rahil.info/2007/07/10000-bc-teaser-trailer.html) is any indication, the movie looks like non-stop mindless action sequences.

When I first heard about the flick, (before I'd seen the trailer,) I thought it was going to be hawking Creationism. ID theory says the Earth and the Universe are approximately 10,000 years old. The number seems to have special significance to the Ken Ham crowd.

[chris-walsh.livejournal.com]

Bold prediction: It will suck donkey balls.

Bolder prediction: Pictures of executives sucking donkey balls is how Emmerich gets his jobs in the first place.

BWA HA HA HA HA HAAAAAAAAAAA.

And I say this as someone who actually has written publicly "I keep enjoying parts of Roland Emmerich's films." (I really don't choose my movie opinions to annoy you, appearances notwithstanding...)

But oy, that film's come back? I remember hearing Emmerich float that remake idea several years ago, back when he still worked with Dean Devlin. (At least Devlin seems to have a sense of humor about his work. He won me over when an article said he introduced himself at some people's-choice-award show this way: "Hi, I'm Dean Devlin, failed actor." No, he didn't speak in hyper-links, but how geeky would it be if he did?)

[muse0fire.livejournal.com]

Did I miss it, or did you already discuss the re-make of "Halloween"?

I stand by my principle that re-makes of movies should only be done of movies that SUCKED and should have been good - not movies that were basically perfect the first time around.

[ariesd.livejournal.com]

Emmerich Did Stargate, so there is credit there.

[chris-walsh.livejournal.com]

"There can be only one Ra."

Sounds kind of like a promo WWE'll use one of these days, huh?

[reannon.livejournal.com]

*timid voice*

I actually liked INDEPENDENCE DAY.

*hangs head in shame*

What can I say? I appreciate cheese. :)

[jennythe-reader.livejournal.com]

It seems like an odd choice of SF movies to remake.

No idea how bad a job he'd do at it. I don't think I've seen any of his earlier work.