Tuesday notes

Man, Tuesday sure feels like a Monday.

1. shadesong got home shortly before I had to leave for work. Needless to say, she's not going into the office today.

2. I finally found my tenth Clockwork Key in KOL, so it's back to actual questing for now. Off to the Valley again.

2.5 Wait -- did they just recently change the ending of the Orc Chasm quest, or is the change (not giving up a certain object) something that happens post-Ascension, and I somehow never noticed it before?

3. Did not watch the new Arrested Development last night (I watch that with shadesong), but I did catch the new Medium, which was fun, if completely and utterly predictable (I love the characters, but I'm getting a little sick of being twenty steps ahead of Joe and Allison, and I was extra annoyed at Allison for not sharing any useful information with Scanlon, who would have figured stuff out). That said, the dream sequences were incredibly well done.

4. Just remembered that postage goes up in five days. Annoying.

5. There's way too much work for the first day after vacation. *grumble*

Memories

Does anyone else remember when A&E and Bravo used to be "arts" cable networks?

Fun, cheesy horror.

We'd had the Cherry Falls/Terror Tract double DVD for a while, but although I'd watched the first movie a few times, I hadn't seen the second until this weekend.

Cherry Falls is a cute little horror spoof. The concept is that the slasher in this only murders virgins, going against the traditional horror movie standard plot. Of course, this small town happens to be full of nice boys and girls, leaving plenty of potential victims. The cast is damned fine -- Brittany Murphy (the brunette version), Jay Mohr, and Michael Biehn star, with direction by Geoffrey Wright (of Romper Stomper fame). It also features Amanda Anka, daughter of Paul (and wife of Jason Bateman), Michael Weston, DJ Qualls, and former Oscar nominee Candy Clark. Some unexpected moments (including an out-of-nowhere scene in which oh-so-innocent Murphy makes Bradford suck her toes), some great lines by Mohr, and a solid climax (so to speak). Definitely fun, and not one I'm overly inclined to spoil.

Terror Tract is from the anthology school of horror. And what a cast. The framing sequence features the late, wonderful John Ritter (in one of his best movies in decades, which speaks volumes about the films he's been in), as a real estate agent trying to sell a house to a nice couple played by David Deluise (Coop on Megas) and Allison Smith (happy sigh). Each house, of course, turns out to be associated with some horrible event, leading to the three stories. All of them are cliches, but well-done ones.

The first ("Nightmare") is an inverted version of Creepshow's "Something to Tide You Over," with CSI: NY's Carmine Giovinazzo as the jilted spouse who plots revenge, Rachel York as his wife, and Fredric Lehne (another great character actor, last seen by most folks as the Marshal on Lost) as the lover. It's a nice twist on the standard "haunting dreams" and "is the horror real, or is it just her guilt" plotlines. It also features a supporting performance by Wade Williams, so good as the asshole captain on Prison Break.

The second story, "Bobo," features Brian Cranston, in a dark twist on his Malcolm in the Middle character (although this came out at the same time as the series, so it's unlikely that it was a deliberate choice). His daughter finds a monkey in their backyard, and Cranston is the only one who sees (or thinks he sees) that the monkey is evil. He gets more paranoid as bad things start happening (including especially bad things to Marcus Alexander "Buff" Bagwell, as an animal control officer), and as with the first, there's a nice amount of "is it real" going on, with the Monkey serving as both a nice external threat, and a representation of a father's fear of losing his daughter's love.

The final segment, "Come to Granny," features Reunion's Will Estes and Desperate Housewives's Brenda Strong (she plays Mary Alice on the show). Will's a kid who visits a psychiatrist (Strong) to tell her of the strange visions he's been having that link him to the Granny Killer, a local murderer who wears a granny mask (guess the store was out of Shatner masks). As his tale goes on, Strong starts to think that it might be more than just a link. The fact that Estes himself suggests that he might have entered a fugue state doesn't help.

All three tales play nicely with the psychological aspects of horror, but the denouement to the framing sequence, in which we find out just how the incentive plan at Ritter's company works, is pure, glorious over-the-top stuff. Damned enjoyable.

No extras for either movie, but both are widescreen, and both are a hell of a lot of fun.

There are motherfucking zombies. On the motherfucking island!

As noted by jenni_powell, this year will see the release of Zombie Island. The concept: a reality show drops seven people onto a zombie-infested island. If they survive for 70 minutes, they win. With Adewale Akinnuoye-Agbaje and Terrence Stamp.

The movie could be fun, could be the apotheosis of suck, or it could be fun cheese. But right now, you can watch the writer-director get sucked into a flame war by a troll on the IMDB boards. And that's always fun.

Because when Nader doesn't want to fuck things up by himself, he's got an organization to do it.

Public Citizen managed to get an effective narcolepsy drug banned after what appears to be a one-in-10000 rate of fatal side-effects.

So glad we have Ralph worrying about our country.

Bacon for kosher people

Bacontarian reviews Beef Bacon. Seems that it's a lot tastier than turkey bacon or tofu bacon (and seriously folks, tofu bacon is league better than turkey bacon, which doesn't even pretend to taste like bacon at all, and yet somehow doesn't taste like turkey, either).

I'm also getting a kick out of reading the blog of the Bacontarian's wife, not least because she named it The Velveteen Rabbi.