How to lose me as a reader, sportswriter edition

Lead with a sentence talking non-ironically about "the pansification of American Football."

Ordering for the next guy

Link swiped from dandelion_diva:

Kashiwa Mystery Cafe, where you get what the last person ordered. And the next customer gets what you ordered (and paid for).

There are all sorts of reasons this idea would fail over here (starting with allergies), but I'd love to visit a place like this. Gives a new meaning to "mystery meat."