Geek social fallacy corollaries
Jul. 14th, 2014 11:07 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
yendi(Bringing out a comment I left on another post and expanding)
Beyond the original bunch of fallacies:
1. Being MUCH more willing to ostracize someone for "making trouble" - defined here as "things that could disrupt our parties" - than for raping or attacking someone within the community (as long as they don't disrupt a party when doing so). Obviously, these aren't people who are afflicted with GSF1, but they are ones who laser-focus their ostracism on people who are loud, or disruptive, or complain. If you do horrible things in private, but are happy and friendly in public (even if that's where you go to find people to do horrible things to), you don't get ostracized.
2. The notion that "our community is fracturing!" is more of a problem than "there's a predator in our community." This goes beyond GSF into outright "asshole" territory, imho. People who believe this way are living a childhood fantasy. Yes, it sucks when communities fracture, but ALL COMMUNITIES FRACTURE ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Life is not "Sex and the City," with your core four besties hanging out ever day, and in large open groups, people move in and out all the time. There are physical moves, there are petty arguments, there are philosophical debates that get out of hand, there are things that are interesting to some members and not others. And there are rapes, sexual assaults, and other horrific things (including people who defend rapists). The more people there are in a "community," the more change (both peaceful and calamitous) there will be.
3. Being flat-out unwilling to accept that someone you're romantically or sexually interested in might do wrong. Pretty self-explanatory, but especially in the sort of geeks who judge themselves based on romantic partnerships, this is a big issue. If you're interested in someone, what does it say about you if they're a predator? So clearly, there's a "misunderstanding," and maybe someone is "missing some of the facts," and your crush/fuckbuddy/partner isn't really a bad person. Or, you know, you're in fucking denial and would rather let your libido trump your empathy for a victim.
4. Redemption magically happens. "It's been a year or two, and surely he hasn't raped/assaulted anyone again, and can't we all just forgive him and move on now?" Has he actually done anything to warrant forgiveness? And by "done anything," I don't mean "offered to bartend for free at the next party." Has he acknowledged his wrongs? Sought counseling? Apologized? Anything? Or are you just tired of keeping someone out of your circle because it's work? Hint: It's probably the latter (or #3 above).
Beyond the original bunch of fallacies:
1. Being MUCH more willing to ostracize someone for "making trouble" - defined here as "things that could disrupt our parties" - than for raping or attacking someone within the community (as long as they don't disrupt a party when doing so). Obviously, these aren't people who are afflicted with GSF1, but they are ones who laser-focus their ostracism on people who are loud, or disruptive, or complain. If you do horrible things in private, but are happy and friendly in public (even if that's where you go to find people to do horrible things to), you don't get ostracized.
2. The notion that "our community is fracturing!" is more of a problem than "there's a predator in our community." This goes beyond GSF into outright "asshole" territory, imho. People who believe this way are living a childhood fantasy. Yes, it sucks when communities fracture, but ALL COMMUNITIES FRACTURE ALL THE FUCKING TIME. Life is not "Sex and the City," with your core four besties hanging out ever day, and in large open groups, people move in and out all the time. There are physical moves, there are petty arguments, there are philosophical debates that get out of hand, there are things that are interesting to some members and not others. And there are rapes, sexual assaults, and other horrific things (including people who defend rapists). The more people there are in a "community," the more change (both peaceful and calamitous) there will be.
3. Being flat-out unwilling to accept that someone you're romantically or sexually interested in might do wrong. Pretty self-explanatory, but especially in the sort of geeks who judge themselves based on romantic partnerships, this is a big issue. If you're interested in someone, what does it say about you if they're a predator? So clearly, there's a "misunderstanding," and maybe someone is "missing some of the facts," and your crush/fuckbuddy/partner isn't really a bad person. Or, you know, you're in fucking denial and would rather let your libido trump your empathy for a victim.
4. Redemption magically happens. "It's been a year or two, and surely he hasn't raped/assaulted anyone again, and can't we all just forgive him and move on now?" Has he actually done anything to warrant forgiveness? And by "done anything," I don't mean "offered to bartend for free at the next party." Has he acknowledged his wrongs? Sought counseling? Apologized? Anything? Or are you just tired of keeping someone out of your circle because it's work? Hint: It's probably the latter (or #3 above).