Superman and Jesus
Sep. 3rd, 2004 11:16 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
yendiSo, the big controversy in the comics world is Marc "Overrated Tool" Millar's contention that Jim "Jesus" Caviezel will be playing Superman. Harry "Ain't I Cool?" Knowles disputes this, but Millar claims to have damned good sources.
Comics fans aren't sure if this is a good thing or not (although if Knowles and Millar get into a fight and bitch-slap each other to death, we all win -- it's sort of like the reverse of Aliens Vs. Predator). But if you think about it, the parts of Jesus and Superman aren't really that far apart. To wit:
Comics fans aren't sure if this is a good thing or not (although if Knowles and Millar get into a fight and bitch-slap each other to death, we all win -- it's sort of like the reverse of Aliens Vs. Predator). But if you think about it, the parts of Jesus and Superman aren't really that far apart. To wit:
| Jesus | Superman | |
| Jewish, but many folks deny it | Obviously Jewish, but many folks deny it | |
| Theoretically the strongest being on Earth | Theoretically the strongest being on Earth | |
| Believes in helping the helpless | Believes in helping the helpless | |
| Killed by a bunch of normal humans | Regularly nearly killed by Lex Luthor, Toyman, and an extra-dimensional imp. |
|
| Has met Swamp Thing (Almost) | Has Met Swamp Thing | |
| Typically depicted with long hair | Went through an ill-advised shoulder-length hair period in the mid-'90s. | |
| Wears a long robe instead of normal clothes | Wears pajamas instead of normal clothes | |
| Died trying to rescue Santa Claus (on South Park) | Died trying to rescue Metropolis | |
| Has come back from the dead at least once | Has come back from the dead at least once | |
| Was stabbed with the Spear of Destiny | Was unable to attack Hitler because of the Spear of Destiny | |
| Torn between being human and obligation to his otherworldly Father |
Torn between being human and obligation to his otherworldly Father | |
| Has a weird antagonistic but polite relationship with Satan | Has a weird antagonistic but respectful relationship with Batman | |
| Has worked with the Holy Ghost | Has worked with The Spectre | |
| Has a team of Twelve Apostles | Has a team of seven to thirteen Justice Leaguers | |
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(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:20 am (UTC)FUNNY but wide.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:21 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:22 am (UTC)Your post is making my brane brew thoughts to filk "Personal Jesus"
Hmmm..."Supeman Jesus."
I may get back to you on that....
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:23 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:32 am (UTC)see, that's how you can tell the hardcore geeks... :)
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:55 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 08:58 am (UTC)Paul Levitz is a Jew and so is Karen Berger... I'm surprised they haven't said... fuck those Christians... let's publish this baby as a special for hardcore comic geeks. There's enough to make back the money or at least break even.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 09:15 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 09:42 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 09:52 am (UTC)Died trying to rescue Santa Claus (on South Park)
Heeeeey. That's not in the Holy Scriptures!
Of cours, neither is...
Has met Swamp Thing (Almost)
...but it might as well be.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:02 am (UTC)But there's a BIG difference between them too!
Date: 2004-09-03 10:03 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:10 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:11 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:12 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:13 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:23 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:32 am (UTC)Re: But there's a BIG difference between them too!
Date: 2004-09-03 10:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:37 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:38 am (UTC)Heeeeey. That's not in the Holy Scriptures!
It's the Book of Cartman.
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:39 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:48 am (UTC)The one Superman Jesus
Someone who flies the skies
And as a baby cries
The one Superman Jesus
Someone who's there for you
Someone who’s a jew
Luthor's got you
In a cage of blue
What to do
This day he will rue
Look to the sky
Watch the Savior fly by
He's the Son of God
So give him your nod
He's got an awsome bod
Laneded in a pod
You he will save
Has risen from the grave
Look up and watch faith
Look up and watch faith
The one Superman Jesus...
Luthor's got you
In a cage of blue
What to do
This day he will rue
Look to the sky
Watch the Savior fly by
You he will save
Has risen from the grave
Look up and watch faith
The one Superman Jesus
Look up and watch faith
(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 10:52 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 11:06 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 11:35 am (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2004-09-03 01:37 pm (UTC)One of the tV satire shows has to do the trailer for the inevitable Tarantino/Gibson co-production of "Kill Jesus: Part one". They beat him. The scourged him. They stabbed him with a spear and nailed him to a cross, and left him for dead. But three days later, he's back for Vengeance. Imagery of Jesus with a Katana, killing many people and saying witty things like, "Turn the other cheek, and I'll cut it off too!", follows.