Dear spammers:
Aug. 18th, 2006 06:08 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
yendiPlease stop sending me email with the subject line, "You always wanted to use your penis as a billiards cue."
I never have. I never will.
See, billiards balls are hard. Very hard. A lot harder than even the most erect penis could ever hope to be, no matter how much Viagra or Cialis (or, as you choose to call them, V1agra or Cia1is) someone takes. If an erect penis were to strike a billiards ball at a typical speed, the penis would break*. The ball would likely not move very far, unless the striker, now in immense pain, accidentally flailed against it.
The only way the subject line could work would be if a person had a prosthetic wooden or ceramic penis. But I don't think the market's really there yet, not least because the blue pool chalk would just look silly.
*Yes, they can break, even though they lack bones. No, I never want to know what that feels like.
I never have. I never will.
See, billiards balls are hard. Very hard. A lot harder than even the most erect penis could ever hope to be, no matter how much Viagra or Cialis (or, as you choose to call them, V1agra or Cia1is) someone takes. If an erect penis were to strike a billiards ball at a typical speed, the penis would break*. The ball would likely not move very far, unless the striker, now in immense pain, accidentally flailed against it.
The only way the subject line could work would be if a person had a prosthetic wooden or ceramic penis. But I don't think the market's really there yet, not least because the blue pool chalk would just look silly.
*Yes, they can break, even though they lack bones. No, I never want to know what that feels like.