261 days of horror, Day 17: Demons
Jan. 23rd, 2007 08:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
yendiDemons. 1986. Directed by Lumberto Bava. Written by Bava and Dario Argento. Released by Ascot films originally, Anchor Bay on DVD.
There are three things you need to know about Demons before watching it:
1. The bad guys are not really what I think of as "demons." They're more like really strong, tough zombies. Although there's clearly something supernatural guiding them*, these are creatures who need to attack others to spread their infection, and who can't throw fireballs or sign one-sided contracts.
2. This movie is gruesome. Before Peter Jackson came along and gave us Bad Taste and Dead Alive, this was one of the few movies that really squicked me.
3. This is not an adaptation of the Dostoevsky novel of the same name.
That said, this is also one of my favorite guilty pleasures.
We start the movie with about twenty minutes of character intros and development, something unheard of in this sort of movie. We meet Final Girl first, as she rides a West Berlin subway and is given a free movie pass from a creepy mute guy in a metal Phantom of the Opera mask. She gets her best friend to join her, and they head for the old movie theatre, which has been newly renovated.
Other characters we meet include a pimp, his two hos, two preppie guys who take a shine to our heroines, a sexy but creepy usherette, a couple who are there just to make out, and an old blind guy and his adult daughter.
Um, yeah. A blind guy. At a movie. He basically spends the time asking his daughter what's going on. His daughter, meanwhile, is necking with some other guy instead of caring for her dad.
Our future victims spend some time milling about the movie prop museum at the front of the theatre, and Ho #1 tries on a demonic mask. That mask cuts her cheek, so she takes it off.
Eventually, everyone heads into the theatre, and the show begins. The movie-within-the-movie features a group of kids who investigate some old ruins, finding an ancient and unspeakably evil mask. Naturally, one of them tries it on, and cuts his face in the exact same way that Ho #1 did. At just that moment, Ho #1 feels some pain in her cut, so she heads to the restroom to clean it out.
At the restroom, Ho #1 slowly, horribly transforms into a creature with long fingernails, fangs, and lots of pus. While this is going on, the mask-wearer in the fake movie is killing his friends horrifically. Pimp is loving it. The Preppies are loving it, because the girls are scared and cuddling them. Everyone else is a little scared.
Eventually, Ho #2 goes to check on her friend, only to find a demon in the bathroom stall**. Ho #2 gets raked across her neck, but gets away, only to get lost and wander backstage. As the on-screen action features a girl dying the longest and most annoying stabbing death ever, Ho #2 herself starts screaming and her neck wound starts pussing up. Eventually, she rips through the screen, and the audience realizes that those were real screams they were hearing.
While Pimp runs up to help her ("She's a friend of mine"), Ho #1 has found Blind Guy's Daughter and her paramour, and wraps a rope around their heads and squeezes them together. On stage, Ho #2 starts to transform into a demon (with loving close-ups of her nails growing and of new fangs forcing out her old teeth), and the corpse of the paramour drops hanging from the ceiling.
Needless to say, things get hectic. And gross. Notable stuff over the next few minutes:
Ho #2 rips the flesh off an older moviegoer.
Blind Guy stumbles across the body of his daughter, shortly before Ho #1 grabs him and gouges his eyes out.
The usual riot ensues, as the moviegoers discover that the doors are locked.
Pimp takes charge and tells people to find the emergency exit.
A girl wanders into a side room for no good reason*** and eventually gets her scalp ripped off by Ho #1.
Pimp and the Preppies**** see this, and eventually barricade Ho #1 inside that room.
The survivors make it up to the projection booth, only to discover that the system is automated. They smash everything.
Things slow down for a bit, as we meet a group of punks driving a car and passing around a can of Coke. As punks often do. We then cut back to our survivors, who have made it to the balcony. They throw the Blind Guy's Daughter and another demon over the side, but the latter lands right on top of the Girl Who Was There to Make Out. Somehow, she escapes, but the demons make it to the top and take out Pimp before anyone can stop them.
We get three separate stories now, as the punks continue to drive around, drinking more Coke, and eventually using the sort of coke that doesn't pay for product placement. The Two Who Were There to Make Out go their own way, and everyone else blocks off the balcony entrance with seats and anything else they can find. Eventually (after about ten scenes), we find out why the punks matter, as they get chased by some cops, and run into the theatre (whose doors now open easily enough). As they sneak in, Blind Guy, now a demon, sneaks out, and takes care of the cops.
The Two Who Were There to Make Out, meanwhile, crawl into the air vents to escape. Alas, since the distaff member of that pair had already been assaulted by demons, you can probably guess what eventually happens. Likewise, the punks make the mistake of opening up the room containing Ho #1 and her victim, and the three who survive are eventually cornered and killed in the main theatre. The demons break into the balcony at the same time, and we get more chaos, as the herd is thinned (the usherette bites it here). In fact, the only folks to survive are the Preppies and the Final Girl and her Friend (the latter of whom has been attacked by a demon and forced to bite its fingers off. Seriously.).
The Friend demonizes, and when the Preppies beat her to death, a baby demon crawls out of her back and slashes Preppie #2. The latter makes a Heroic Sacrifice and gets his friend to behead him with a prop sword from the museum. And with only two left, we get the scene we've been waiting for since horror movies first began:
Two people riding around a movie theatre on a prop motorcycle (and a full tank of gas) slicing into demons,
Eventually, the laws of physics assert themselves, and FInal Girl is thrown from the bike, but Preppie #1 kills the remaining demons in the room (although not without getting cut himself -- we don't know if it's from a demon or just a scrape).
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that the only thing that could logically happen next would be for a previously unseen helicopter to crash through the roof, giving the survivors on chance to escape. You'd be right. As more demons flood into the main theatre, Preppie #1 uses his MacGuyver skills and a winch to get them to the roof. Once there, they're attacked by the Metal Phantom of the Opera guy from the opening scene (who, like everyone else, knew they'd try to escape by having a random chopper crash through the roof, and was thus waiting for them), but the heroes overcome him by impaling his head on a spike.
As more demons make it to the roof, Preppie #1 and Final Girl climb down a fire escape, only to discover the terrible truth: the entire city has been infested by demons. Just as all looks lost, a family in a Jeep rescues them, and they go riding off into the night as the credits roll.
Only, just as things seem okay, out of nowhere, Final Girl scratches her neck, and Oh Noes! She's a Demon. The little kid in the Jeep shoots her as Preppie #1 looks on in horror, and we fade to black.
Demons is pure, unadulterated schlock. Director Lumberto Bava, son of Mario Bava (one of the great directors of Giallo movies), isn’t a tenth as talented as his dad, and this is easily his best work. Dario Argento (whose name is much more prominent than Bava’s on all promotional material) co-wrote the movie with Bava, but the film lacks his flair, and often trundles off into the nonsensical (a blind guy? At the movies?).
That said, the movie is still a blast, starting off with the Romero-esque idea that we are what we consume, only on a pop culture level, before descending into a serious of gory and graphic kills. Bava does a good job of turning the movie theatre into a genuinely threatening building, and if the pacing occasionally is problematic (hey, another scene with the punks driving!), things usually pick up pretty quickly.
Demons also gets bonus points for a soundtrack featuring Motley Crüe, Billy Idol, and the man whose name is synonymous with horror movie music, Rick Springfield. Throw in music by Claudio Simonetti (of Goblin), and you’ve got audio that carries the move along nicely.
This is highly recommended for those with the stomach for it, assuming you can check your brains at the door.
*And, as an aside, has anyone noticed the complete lack of the supernatural in post-Romero zombie movies? Sure, some keep the answer vague and have characters suggest that something's up ("When Hell is full, the dead shall walk the earth!"), but in the end, it's usually science at fault, if any fault is ever assigned. Pretty odd, for a horror trope that has its origins in voodoo.
**Demons in the Bathroom Stall would make a much better movie than Angels in the Outfield.
***Other than the fact that she's a fucking moron.
****Which would make a great band name.
There are three things you need to know about Demons before watching it:
1. The bad guys are not really what I think of as "demons." They're more like really strong, tough zombies. Although there's clearly something supernatural guiding them*, these are creatures who need to attack others to spread their infection, and who can't throw fireballs or sign one-sided contracts.
2. This movie is gruesome. Before Peter Jackson came along and gave us Bad Taste and Dead Alive, this was one of the few movies that really squicked me.
3. This is not an adaptation of the Dostoevsky novel of the same name.
That said, this is also one of my favorite guilty pleasures.
We start the movie with about twenty minutes of character intros and development, something unheard of in this sort of movie. We meet Final Girl first, as she rides a West Berlin subway and is given a free movie pass from a creepy mute guy in a metal Phantom of the Opera mask. She gets her best friend to join her, and they head for the old movie theatre, which has been newly renovated.
Other characters we meet include a pimp, his two hos, two preppie guys who take a shine to our heroines, a sexy but creepy usherette, a couple who are there just to make out, and an old blind guy and his adult daughter.
Um, yeah. A blind guy. At a movie. He basically spends the time asking his daughter what's going on. His daughter, meanwhile, is necking with some other guy instead of caring for her dad.
Our future victims spend some time milling about the movie prop museum at the front of the theatre, and Ho #1 tries on a demonic mask. That mask cuts her cheek, so she takes it off.
Eventually, everyone heads into the theatre, and the show begins. The movie-within-the-movie features a group of kids who investigate some old ruins, finding an ancient and unspeakably evil mask. Naturally, one of them tries it on, and cuts his face in the exact same way that Ho #1 did. At just that moment, Ho #1 feels some pain in her cut, so she heads to the restroom to clean it out.
At the restroom, Ho #1 slowly, horribly transforms into a creature with long fingernails, fangs, and lots of pus. While this is going on, the mask-wearer in the fake movie is killing his friends horrifically. Pimp is loving it. The Preppies are loving it, because the girls are scared and cuddling them. Everyone else is a little scared.
Eventually, Ho #2 goes to check on her friend, only to find a demon in the bathroom stall**. Ho #2 gets raked across her neck, but gets away, only to get lost and wander backstage. As the on-screen action features a girl dying the longest and most annoying stabbing death ever, Ho #2 herself starts screaming and her neck wound starts pussing up. Eventually, she rips through the screen, and the audience realizes that those were real screams they were hearing.
While Pimp runs up to help her ("She's a friend of mine"), Ho #1 has found Blind Guy's Daughter and her paramour, and wraps a rope around their heads and squeezes them together. On stage, Ho #2 starts to transform into a demon (with loving close-ups of her nails growing and of new fangs forcing out her old teeth), and the corpse of the paramour drops hanging from the ceiling.
Needless to say, things get hectic. And gross. Notable stuff over the next few minutes:
Ho #2 rips the flesh off an older moviegoer.
Blind Guy stumbles across the body of his daughter, shortly before Ho #1 grabs him and gouges his eyes out.
The usual riot ensues, as the moviegoers discover that the doors are locked.
Pimp takes charge and tells people to find the emergency exit.
A girl wanders into a side room for no good reason*** and eventually gets her scalp ripped off by Ho #1.
Pimp and the Preppies**** see this, and eventually barricade Ho #1 inside that room.
The survivors make it up to the projection booth, only to discover that the system is automated. They smash everything.
Things slow down for a bit, as we meet a group of punks driving a car and passing around a can of Coke. As punks often do. We then cut back to our survivors, who have made it to the balcony. They throw the Blind Guy's Daughter and another demon over the side, but the latter lands right on top of the Girl Who Was There to Make Out. Somehow, she escapes, but the demons make it to the top and take out Pimp before anyone can stop them.
We get three separate stories now, as the punks continue to drive around, drinking more Coke, and eventually using the sort of coke that doesn't pay for product placement. The Two Who Were There to Make Out go their own way, and everyone else blocks off the balcony entrance with seats and anything else they can find. Eventually (after about ten scenes), we find out why the punks matter, as they get chased by some cops, and run into the theatre (whose doors now open easily enough). As they sneak in, Blind Guy, now a demon, sneaks out, and takes care of the cops.
The Two Who Were There to Make Out, meanwhile, crawl into the air vents to escape. Alas, since the distaff member of that pair had already been assaulted by demons, you can probably guess what eventually happens. Likewise, the punks make the mistake of opening up the room containing Ho #1 and her victim, and the three who survive are eventually cornered and killed in the main theatre. The demons break into the balcony at the same time, and we get more chaos, as the herd is thinned (the usherette bites it here). In fact, the only folks to survive are the Preppies and the Final Girl and her Friend (the latter of whom has been attacked by a demon and forced to bite its fingers off. Seriously.).
The Friend demonizes, and when the Preppies beat her to death, a baby demon crawls out of her back and slashes Preppie #2. The latter makes a Heroic Sacrifice and gets his friend to behead him with a prop sword from the museum. And with only two left, we get the scene we've been waiting for since horror movies first began:
Two people riding around a movie theatre on a prop motorcycle (and a full tank of gas) slicing into demons,
Eventually, the laws of physics assert themselves, and FInal Girl is thrown from the bike, but Preppie #1 kills the remaining demons in the room (although not without getting cut himself -- we don't know if it's from a demon or just a scrape).
Now, I know what you're thinking. You're thinking that the only thing that could logically happen next would be for a previously unseen helicopter to crash through the roof, giving the survivors on chance to escape. You'd be right. As more demons flood into the main theatre, Preppie #1 uses his MacGuyver skills and a winch to get them to the roof. Once there, they're attacked by the Metal Phantom of the Opera guy from the opening scene (who, like everyone else, knew they'd try to escape by having a random chopper crash through the roof, and was thus waiting for them), but the heroes overcome him by impaling his head on a spike.
As more demons make it to the roof, Preppie #1 and Final Girl climb down a fire escape, only to discover the terrible truth: the entire city has been infested by demons. Just as all looks lost, a family in a Jeep rescues them, and they go riding off into the night as the credits roll.
Only, just as things seem okay, out of nowhere, Final Girl scratches her neck, and Oh Noes! She's a Demon. The little kid in the Jeep shoots her as Preppie #1 looks on in horror, and we fade to black.
Demons is pure, unadulterated schlock. Director Lumberto Bava, son of Mario Bava (one of the great directors of Giallo movies), isn’t a tenth as talented as his dad, and this is easily his best work. Dario Argento (whose name is much more prominent than Bava’s on all promotional material) co-wrote the movie with Bava, but the film lacks his flair, and often trundles off into the nonsensical (a blind guy? At the movies?).
That said, the movie is still a blast, starting off with the Romero-esque idea that we are what we consume, only on a pop culture level, before descending into a serious of gory and graphic kills. Bava does a good job of turning the movie theatre into a genuinely threatening building, and if the pacing occasionally is problematic (hey, another scene with the punks driving!), things usually pick up pretty quickly.
Demons also gets bonus points for a soundtrack featuring Motley Crüe, Billy Idol, and the man whose name is synonymous with horror movie music, Rick Springfield. Throw in music by Claudio Simonetti (of Goblin), and you’ve got audio that carries the move along nicely.
This is highly recommended for those with the stomach for it, assuming you can check your brains at the door.
*And, as an aside, has anyone noticed the complete lack of the supernatural in post-Romero zombie movies? Sure, some keep the answer vague and have characters suggest that something's up ("When Hell is full, the dead shall walk the earth!"), but in the end, it's usually science at fault, if any fault is ever assigned. Pretty odd, for a horror trope that has its origins in voodoo.
**Demons in the Bathroom Stall would make a much better movie than Angels in the Outfield.
***Other than the fact that she's a fucking moron.
****Which would make a great band name.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 01:40 am (UTC)Invested? What are they? The zombie love-children of Donald Trump?
Please see this movie (http://news.yahoo.com/s/nm/20070123/review_nm/film_teeth_dc_1) and review it.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 01:45 am (UTC)Now that's a scary image.
Teeth is definitely a film I want to see.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 01:51 am (UTC)The 'science is bad' trope seems to be inherited from latter-day gothic. Frankenstein, Jekyll and Hyde and the like. A combination of quasi-religious fervour and the fact that anything people don't understand, they fear.
Finally, "Pimp and the Preppies" and "Demons in the Bathroom Stall" are both great names for their respective things. You rock.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:28 pm (UTC)Good points about the science; there's definitely a current of fear of science (flowing out of the monster films of the '50s) in many of the current flicks (28 Days Later being an obvious one).
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:44 pm (UTC)back in the late 1980s, sassy ran a profile on a blind girl who went to movies all the time -- particularly horror movies, which she liked for the suspense.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 03:43 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:40 am (UTC)I'm also hoping at some point, towards the middle or the year, you'll do a gimmick to keep people interested. Like the Series Week, or the Remake Duo (Review the original, then the remake).
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:29 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 03:07 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:58 am (UTC)Deus ex helicopter. Gets me every time.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:29 pm (UTC)Heh.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 03:15 am (UTC)You are kidding, right?!
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:33 pm (UTC)(And yes, I was kidding).
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 03:02 pm (UTC)(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 06:47 am (UTC)It's not? Darn... that is one of my all-time favorite books. Then again, I can't imagine anyone making it in under 8 hours of film.
BTW, I really don't like horror too much but I totally love your reviews. Me and SNO read them every time. It's becoming a family thing.
(no subject)
Date: 2007-01-24 02:33 pm (UTC)