Dear promoters of Saw V:

[yendi]

The problem with the tagline "you'll never believe how it ends," is that, having seen the first four pieces of shit in the series (and their attendant ludicrous endings), it's actually impossible for you to come up with an ending that's outside the realm of my expectations. Seriously. If Saw V ends with Billy the Puppet ripping off his mask to reveal that he's actually Kermit the Frog, who then proceeds to perform a musical montage featuring the soundtracks of Meet the Feebles and Saturday Night Fever, I'd barely blink.

Of course, maybe you mean that "the ending will be unbelievable, in the sense that it will be poorly written, stretch the bounds of suspension of disbelief, and contain at least sixteen logical inconsistencies."

If that's the case, I suspect that the tagline is pretty accurate.

Comments

[lynxreign.livejournal.com]

Maybe the ending makes sense.

[yendi]

Now that's just crazy talk!

[lynxreign.livejournal.com]

See, they're right, you won't believe it!

[luis-mw.livejournal.com]

recently, I have noticed a couple of trailers for shows on Sky that make a big thing of "From the makers of Independence Day.."
And each time, I ask "and this is a recommendation how?"
I suppose, though, that this could be a good thing - "From the people who brought you a load of shit, here it an even bigger load of shit, so you need not waste your time watching"

[yendi]

Heh. In fairness, it's better than saying, "from the makers of the Godzilla remake."

[chesyaburke.livejournal.com]

This is the reason I only saw the first one. There are only so many completely over the top twist endings one person can stand.

[sistermaryeris.livejournal.com]

Ugh, if it ends in rainbows and puppies I won't believe it. Those movies are horrible.

Here's the Ending!

[jerel.livejournal.com]

It turns out Rosebud was a sled.

[cscottd.livejournal.com]

ripping off his mask to reveal that he's actually Kermit the Frog, who then proceeds to perform a musical montage featuring the soundtracks of Meet the Feebles and Saturday Night Fever

Well, I guess I won't be using that plotline for my NaNoWriMo novel this year. :)

[yendi]

Well, it is one of the seven classic plots.

[mfree.livejournal.com]

There's a IV?

[yendi]

Yep. And they're already planning VI.

[mfree.livejournal.com]

Saw VI:

Here's how the plot should go. First, Shawnee Smith, Crystal Thierry, and Maggie Gyllenhaal have an extended lesbian striptease session complete with poles and all. This runs for, oh, 160 minutes.

Then we get to see masked men knock the skulls off of the top ten political figures (simulated) from both parties with driving wedges, and we segue into the imagery of a new class of superweapon turning the Sulaiman mountains and Balochistan Plateau into a new saltwarer lake in 4-5 minutes.

Should make billions.

[phantom_wolfboy]

Why do you torture yourself? I mean, after the first one I haven't even bothered reading summaries of the others . . .

[yendi]

I like train wrecks. And horror movies. And Saw manages to be one of those two, at least.

[amokk]

Scream Queens = Saw 6. Fun. But hey, maybe Saw is trying to be like Friday the 13th, maybe we'll get a "Jigsaw Takes Gary, IN" soon...

[allroads.livejournal.com]

Here, if you're curious and wish to save $10.
http://www.themoviespoiler.com/Spoilers/sawV.html

It sounds a lot like the ending to another movie sequel...only much more brutal.